Saturday, December 8, 2007

Happy 50th Post, with Rachel Bilson

First off: I'm very happy to report that this is Fashion Poirot's 50th post. I'm extremely proud that Fashion Poirot turned out to be the little blog that could- despite of all the obstacles. So thank you, readers- for reading!

And who better to help us celebrate this joyous day than Rachel Bilson?

I must admit, the comparison isn't exactly working out for her. I probably would never have noticed her outfit, if she hadn't been standing next to the just-as-petite and just-as-sparkly, yet immaculate, Kristen Bell. Kristen balances all of her proportions perfectly and makes her legs look miles long. Also, it's refreshing to see a sparkling holiday dress that's actually dress-length, as opposed to tunic- or shirt-length.

I like Rachel's top (and hair, and makeup, and slim figure, and guest spot on Chuck)...but her pants are too long. They're not stylishly long, they're just way too long. When Katie Holmes wears too-long pants, she looks like she needs a tailor. However, when women of shorter stature, such as Rachel, wear too-long pants, they look like they accidentally forgot half of each leg at the bus stop one day. If that makes any sense at all.

Thursday, December 6, 2007

Rumer Willis

Ugh.


I had been foolishly optimistic enough to believe that the formal shorts epidemic had died down, at least for the season. I was very wrong. These ill-fitting incarnations of my least-favorite trend should never have seen the light of day.

Like some, er, other things. Like...oh, I don't know...her bra, maybe? I can tell that the Golden Globes will be an exciting night for the fashion world, judging by this outfit.

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

SPECIAL POST: Jennifer Morrison

Oh, Jen! No! Don't do this to me! I love you on House. I love your character, and I'm sort of beginning to warm to the blond hair and the retro old-Hollywood feel you've been channeling at all of the awards shows this fall. But this...


I think that in your heart, you know that this is a bad look for you. The dress could be so cute...and then it has to finish with a furry bodice? It's probably just velvety, but it looks furry. Judging from your facial expressions in all of the photos, you're pretty doubtful. And with good reason. You can wear a fur wrap over a dress, sure...but as part of a dress?

And right after this fiasco, too:


Be warned, Jennifer. (Yes, more stern now). Fashion Poirot still loves you. But if you keep dressing like this, that might just change...

Monday, December 3, 2007

Fergie

Dearest Fergie,


We get it, already. You think you're hot. We should too. You bear absolutely zero, zero, ZERO resemblance to a man. But there are more subtle ways of sending such messages. This looks like a Victorian torture instrument-like corset gone very wrong. Especially with that chain-mail bag...it's all very Spanish Inquisition. I'm a little bit scared, actually. You're a walking Iron Maiden. And you're frightening everybody around you.

Sunday, December 2, 2007

Unknown!

I don't know who this lady standing next to Ms. Hudgens is, but I do know that I hate her dress.


Even if you are in Miami, that's no reason to wear what amounts to a full-length swimsuit.